I think about you every day. I know it may seem like I moved on and never looked back, but that doesn’t mean you’re not constantly in the back of my mind.
I hope you’re proud of me, even though you didn’t want me.
I’m not sorry I couldn’t be the perfect daughter.
I have a pup named Daisy and she’s saved more times than I can count.
I was engaged at 21, but never got married.
Sometimes I look in the mirror and get sad that I look so much like you.
The only family photo I have of you, me, and dad is a collage I made of all three of us. It’s what I show my friend when they ask to see my parents.
I moved to Maine a couple of months ago.
I went to Canada solo.
I ran two half marathons this year.
Anytime I wear the color olive green…I think about you and that cardigan you used to wear every night.
I still think about the Tiffany necklace you gave me at 16…that I left behind. I went back for it once when no one was home, but sadly never found it.
I can’t smell Dolce and Cabana Light Blue without getting a million memories of you.
Marinara, street tacos, and blue cheese with honey always remind me of you.
I wish you knew who I was.
I wish you could have watched me grow up.
I graduated with my Bachelors in Microbiology from the University of Tennessee.
I had a miscarriage my senior year of college.
My favorite color is pink.
I watched someone have a massive stroke and die right in front of me…and all I wanted was for you to tell me everything would be okay.
I still make myself a carrot cake for my birthday every year.
I even try to take myself to Sonobana each year for the Superbowl.
I hope you forgive me for never coming back.
If we ever have a relationship again…I really hope you get to see me get married and meet you grandchildren (if I ever have any). I didn’t forget about Team 11, but maybe this one will be Team 12.
Every time I crochet something, all I can think about is how you made me learn how to crochet as a kid and I complained the whole time.
I was very upset when our childhood dog died, and you didn’t tell me.
I miss you.
I finally started decorating for Christmas.
Sometimes I get a tune stuck in my head and then realized it’s a song that you used to play. I search all over the internet until I find it.
You were right about me developing an eating disorder.
Thank you for always telling me I could be anything I wanted to be, even if you’re not here to see it.
I was blonde for a period of time, and it was true…blondes do have more fun.
I remember when we were sitting at the dining table, and you told the whole family that I was most likely to become and alcoholic…I think of that every time there is a drink in my hand and that always makes me put my drink down.
I cried all night alone in a hospital bed, begging the nurses to bring you to me when I had back surgery. I also told them I was allergic to mushrooms, but I’m not.
“I have to pick my happiness over you.” Did you know that’s the last thing you ever said to me?
I finally mastered a chocolate chip cookie recipe, and I make them every year for Christmas now.
I used to sneak ham in the fridge at night, when I was supposedly “vegetarian.” I never told a single soul, but it was funny watching my siblings get in trouble.
I don’t lie anymore…I lied all the time as a kid and now I can’t seem to.
I struggle a lot with love and wonder if anyone will ever love me…because you couldn’t love your own daughter.
I still have the last two gifts you ever gave me, the wooden sign and Tennessee necklace.
Also, I still have the same pillow and baby blanket…funnily enough I still try and find the same sheets, so my bed feels the same.
I was looking at buying All-Clad dishes the other day…just like the same set you cooked with.
I write a blog.
Oh, by the way…if you ever wonder where your dangly pearl earrings went, I have then in my jewelry bowl. I wear them whenever I need to look professional.
I have this black vintage dress I get a couple years back and I think you would love it.
I hope you’re happy…truly.
My favorite song this year was called “Dawns” by Zach Bryan and I think you’d like it to.
I miss hearing you sing in the car with me.
Congratulation on living for half a century. Happy 50th Birthday!
